With 30 just around the corner, I've been reflecting on the person I've been, the person I'm becoming, and some of the experiences that have shaped me along the way.

I definitely don't have life figured out, but if there's one thing this year has taught me, it's that growth doesn't always look the way you expect it to.

Here are 11 things I'd tell my younger self, or anyone who's still figuring things out in their twenties.

1. You don't have to feel confident to do something that scares you.

For a long time, being shy and overthinking things could make stepping outside my comfort zone feel like a much bigger deal than it might seem to someone else. This year, I've continued putting myself in situations that challenge me socially and personally, even when I haven't felt completely comfortable. Joining Vetri Tamil Boxing was one of those experiences. I didn't suddenly become a different person overnight, but I showed up, kept going and gave myself the chance to grow. I've learnt that confidence isn't always something you need before you begin. Sometimes, it's something you build by doing the things that scare you.

2. You don't have to wait for someone else to come along before you start living your life.

This year, I've been making more of an effort to put myself out there by attending different kinds of events, sometimes on my own, and giving myself opportunities to meet new people and make friends. For someone who can be shy and overthink social situations, walking into an unfamiliar room without knowing many people isn't always the easiest thing to do. But I've learnt that if I keep waiting until I feel completely comfortable, I could miss out on so many experiences. Not every event will lead to a new friendship, and not every conversation will turn into a lasting connection, but that doesn't mean it wasn't worth going. I'm learning that I can feel nervous and still show up, go somewhere alone and still enjoy myself, and give new connections a chance without knowing where they'll lead. Sometimes, you have to give life the opportunity to surprise you.

3. You can give something your all and still not get the outcome you hoped for — and that doesn't make it a failure.

One of my biggest lessons this year came through boxing. I committed to the Vetri Season 1 journey, attended almost every training session and kept showing up, even when I wasn't progressing as quickly as I'd hoped. Ultimately, I wasn't selected to fight this season, and of course, there was a different outcome I'd originally hoped for. But I also received the Most Resilient Fighter — Vetri Season 1, 2026 trophy. That meant something to me because it recognised the commitment and perseverance I'd put in. I've learnt that sometimes you don't get the exact result you wanted, but you can still walk away with something valuable that you didn't have before.

4. Sometimes, the things you think you're doing for one reason end up giving you something much bigger.

I initially joined boxing to challenge myself, build confidence, improve my concentration and develop discipline. I didn't expect the experience to mean as much to me as it has. It became about more than learning a sport. It gave me a sense of belonging, opportunities to connect with people and something to look forward to. It reminded me that trying something new can open doors you didn't even know you needed opened. Sometimes, the biggest reward isn't the achievement you went in looking for, but the person you become along the way.

5. Not everyone who comes into your life will stay, but that doesn't mean the connection meant nothing.

This year has also reminded me how difficult it can be when friendships change or when people you once felt close to are no longer part of your everyday life in the same way. I've had moments where I've felt sad about those changes and wondered what they meant. I'm still learning to accept that not every connection will turn out how I hoped, and not every friendship will last forever. But I don't want the sadness of losing a connection to erase the good that came from it. I can appreciate what someone meant to me while also learning to move forward when things change.

6. Don't be embarrassed about having feelings or caring about people.

I can sometimes overthink what I've said, worry about how I've come across or wish I'd kept certain feelings to myself. This year has reminded me that being emotionally affected by something doesn't make me weak, foolish or silly. When something matters to you, it's natural to feel something about it. I'm learning that I can acknowledge my feelings without judging myself for having them, and that I don't need to apologise for being someone who cares deeply. I'm still learning how to express myself in a way that feels comfortable, but I'd rather learn to understand my emotions than spend my life pretending they don't exist.

7. You don't have to be the most experienced person in the room to deserve to be there.

Whether it's learning a new skill, navigating a new environment or putting myself out there socially, I've sometimes felt conscious of what I don't know or what I haven't done yet. Boxing was a particularly good reminder that everyone starts somewhere. You don't become experienced by waiting until you're already good at something. You become experienced by giving yourself permission to learn. I've learnt that I don't need to compare my progress with someone else's or prove myself every time I walk into a room. I can simply be there, learn what I can and keep improving.

8. You can be proud of yourself even when you're still a work in progress.

I think it's easy to focus on the things we haven't achieved yet, the things we wish we'd done differently or the areas where we think we should be further ahead by a certain age. I've had moments where I've focused more on what I haven't done than on what I have. But when I look back at this year, I can see the effort I've made, the challenges I've faced and the situations I've kept showing up for, even when they weren't easy. I don't need to have every aspect of my life sorted to recognise that I've made progress. I can want to grow more while still appreciating the person I am today.

9. You don't need to have your entire future mapped out before you take the next step.

In my twenties, I've explored different interests, built my experience in accountancy and started developing Saranka's Studio. I've learnt that life doesn't always follow one neat, predictable path, and that having different ambitions doesn't mean you're lost. Sometimes you learn what you want by trying something, discovering what works for you and adjusting as you go. I don't have to know exactly where every opportunity will lead before I allow myself to pursue it. I can take the next step with what I know now and trust myself to keep learning along the way.

10. The people who encourage you can make a bigger difference than they realise.

One thing I've appreciated through my boxing journey is the encouragement I've received from people who have supported me, recognised my efforts and reminded me that I belong. When you're someone who sometimes doubts yourself, a little encouragement can stay with you for a long time. It's reminded me how important it is to have people around you who see your potential, but also how much a few kind words can mean to someone else. I want to carry that lesson with me, both by appreciating the people who encourage me and by being someone who encourages others when I can.

11. You don't have to become a completely different person to grow into a stronger version of yourself.

Perhaps the biggest thing I'm taking away from this year is that personal growth doesn't mean suddenly becoming fearless, never overthinking anything, or having every situation figured out. I can still be shy and want to become more confident. I can still feel things deeply and learn to handle those feelings better. I can still have setbacks and choose to keep going. I can be proud of how far I've come while recognising there's so much more I want to experience. I'm learning that growth isn't about becoming someone else. It's about giving myself more opportunities to become who I want to be.

As I get ready to leave my twenties behind, I know there are things I'd do differently and things I still wish were different. But I also know that this year has taught me more about resilience, confidence, friendship and myself than I might have realised at the time.

I'm still learning. Still growing. Still figuring things out.

And maybe that's okay.

I don't need to have everything figured out by 30. I just want to keep giving myself the chance to grow. 🤎